You guts, Polyphonic Spree is playing a show on New Year’s Eve. I briefly considered going because I am 21 years old and because I should be out doing fun things and if I am not out doing fun things then people will think I’m a total square. Then I realized that social situations like this make me really, REALLY nervous and it sounds like such a hassle and it’s expensive plus that’s the night people will be driving drunk and it’s all the way at the House of Blues and I’d rather just hang out by myself or with my brother and his fiance and if people ask I can tell them I did something really cool, maybe I’ll even lie about going to see the Polyphonic Spree ha ha ha, wouldn’t I be cool then?
The point is, I realized I wouldn’t go when one of my reasons for going was so I didn’t look like a loser for not going. The picture, above, is proof that I can easily redeem myself from looking like a total loser with anxiety problems by masking my sad, doughy emotional weaknessES with hilarioUS OH NO THE CAPS LOCK IS BACK ON HOW DO I STOP THIS OH MAN I AM HACKED OFF NOT AGAIN.
First published: the eastReprinted: the west
Comparative Lit and Film. I really enjoy Scott Bradfield, David Foster Wallace, and Kenneth Rexroth.
